Here it is! The first draft of my animatic! :D There were a few complications in creating duplicates of the same character doing the same action in a scene, in particular the Eagle's abstract sequence which nearly resulted in maya crashing. Once I find a solution to this, it shall be resolved!! (^_^)/b I've also made a change in camera movement at the end to a still camera that zooms out rather than a swerving camera. Any feedback on this would be appreciated and loved!! :D
Original edit: based on animatic.
Original edit: based on animatic.
Version 2: Change of camera movement at the end for a less handheld 'trippy' feel. (edit: re-uploaded)
Hi Jojo,
ReplyDeleteWell done on getting this pre-biz up - and as I thought there are a few elements that are now coming into question re. their effectiveness in 3D. We spoke a bit earlier about the 'elk leg' sequence - which looks rather odd now, because the stylisation of the leg itself means it doesn't read as a leg, but rather as a curious-looking drumstick. I'm going to suggest that you re-think this sequence completely. One suggestion is that, instead of legs, you have the trunks of your flat trees - and we see the animals snaking in between them. I also don't think - (don't kill me) - that the 'wing' scene is working now (each bit of the animal appearing in that coloured fan arrangement) - again, because the stylisation of the animals means their isolated body parts feel a bit stumpy and too dislocated now. Again, I simply suggest that you identify another means of displaying your animals to decorative effect for the duration of the scene that still picks up on the music nicely. I can almost see this sequence being as simple as each animal appearing one after the other to form a line of run-cycles across the middle of the white space. Anyway - it's something to think about, because those two scenes don't quite work in this 3D world.
In terms of your opening with the bird - I know you've got more animation to do yet - but there's something rather weak about that bird just flying across the screen like that - it doesn't quite capture the activity of the music. I wonder if the first few seconds could be busier - like we begin by seeing the flap of wings, as if the bird has been startled into the sky by the begining music; it's abstract; just feathers/wings flapping - a flurry - and then we see the bird fly across the sky?
I think the camera needs to get closer to the butterfly? As if the camera attaches to it for a few seconds, follows it, so we're up close to the moment when the butterfly lands on the sea cow's nose; you can then use continuity editing to cut back to the more distant shot just before the sea cow goes back under the water. (Your camera is much closer in your animatic if you look - right now, you are keep your camera very distant from everything).
I think the sea pike should also be in the 'rotating' scene with the sea cow, as they were just there in the previous scene - and then they're gone in the next scene; the fish could be another circle of movement, but perhaps running the other way?
In terms of the ending in the museum, I don't much like the wavering camera (and you've got a strange overlay effect in the second pre-biz) - can you just try it as a straight, simple pull back? This means rearranging your animals, so the camera can track back in a simple controlled line, revealing each dead animal in turn. I think you need to just calm this final reveal down. I also think to need to finesse the 'wind blowing' SFX too; let that die down too as the camera moves further away. Are you going to include the WWF logo etc in your animation? If so I suggest you seek to get this into your pre-viz too, so you can give your piece a proper ending.
We'll chat more about this tomorrow no doubt :)
Hey Phil,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the feedback, I see what you mean about the wings sequence- the more I see it the more it feels flat to me and more suitable for 2D. I dont know how the ending got overlaid but I will get that fixed and the camera angles too :D Ive made a few sketches on these new changes which I'll show you them tomorrow! ^_^